Do you ever just want to walk around pointing out your "changes" to your spouse? I am thinking about that because I see SO many things changing with W and yet I can't be sure if I am imagining it, if it's real but not what I think, things that are coincidentally changing or if they are things she is intentionally trying to change to better herself/our marriage.
I think it would be SO helpful for me to believe in her intentions if I KNEW, by way of come verbal backup explaining things to me, she was making active changes in her behavior. As it stands, and as she's recently told me, I am left to simply observe her without any commentary from her explaining what she's doing... or not. I don't want to come off needy, but I just find this game tireing.
From my perspective, as I know we ALL feel from the get-go with DBing, I have always wanted to just tell her all the changes I have made and am making to improve my life/our life together but I know I can't do that, or SHOULDN'T do that because according to DB wisdom, they need to SEE the changes before they believe they are real.
I guess I am just a verbal communicator and don't like to read minds or look really hard for clues. I need to improve in at least one of those areas.
I suppose bottom line is that like I told muddle and others, questioning their INTENTIONS or MOTIVATIONS is not really helpful so long as the end result is the same.
