Here's my update. I haven't posted for a while because I have a thread going on the MCL board.
Throuhgout August, my H and i have been "working on the marraige". I haven't been checking up on him. I'm at a point where I don't even want to know if he's with her. So, he would come over most nights, but more and more I was noticing that he was going out with "the guys". In some cases, i know he was with the guys, but in others, i just don't know.
We went to Jamaica in late Aug. It was very nice and we had a great time. But as soon as we came back, he withdrew again. Once again, he was going out several nights a week. He was getting colder and colder to me, but at the same time was saying that he wanted to move back in. He spend a weekend here at the house, but by Sunday I could tell he didn't want to be here. That's when I finally hit that point.
I sat him down and told him that he's still struggling with something adn that i've made all the changes in the M that he's asked me to make and it's not enough... it's never enough. I told him that I missed the old him. He said that he didn't know where the old him was anymore. I was crying the whole time, but basically told him that he needed to go figure stuff out on his own. I didn't bring up OW at all. I made it more about him and the person he's become and how he's become a stranger.
So, he left. That was a Sunday. We agreed that he'd bring the kids to school on Tuesday and that we'd meet up again in MC on Wed and then he'd take the kids Wed night. I didn't hear from him all day Monday. He was late pickign up the kids on Tuesday. I knew in my heart he was with OW... but I also knew that when I told him to go figure stuff out that that's basically what I meant anyway.
So, on Tues morning when he picked up the kids, he gave me a hug and a kiss and said he'd call me later. He called Tuesday evening and said he really wanted to work things through and that we could survuve this. I told him that I didn't want to be treated like this anymore. He's been spending time with me and the kids ever since, but I know there's a good chance he'll go back to her again. THings seem to be good now, but i've been through all this before. He is saying he wants to move back in over the next month. I am so sick of walking on eggshells.
Will he ever be over OW? Will he ever be completely engaged in me again, without having the temptation of her out there? Help.
