Why are you suggesting that she call her friends? This is kind of micromanaging, isn't it? That was an example of something I did in the past and realise I can't help her. She has to do her own things. More below.
Why did i do it in the past? Because I could see BB was being influenced by watching news events like the Afghanistan and Iraq invasions, the Palestinian bombing buses in Israel, then The Islamic Militant bombings in Baghdad, and some of the crimes committed against women by men, 6 to 8 hours a day was getting her worked up and that spilled over into our R. That much news was too much for me too.
We had a few days of little TV time and I have said I was not watching it with her several times.
That is one reason I asked BB to start calling her friends and talk to them or do something with them. This is another reason we go out to eat sometimes, I want to get BB away from the 24/7 news programs. If she doesn't want to go, I go by myself.
I asked you this before, too... is there anything about her that is TRULY lovable to you? On good days, we get along great, lots of give and take, not much pickyness, few radical statements. I am looking and working for more good days.
I am not going to force it to happen, mostly trying to provide some options and opportunities.
just cranky or resistant. That is a good way to put it.
Or are you so focused on the things about her that bug you that you can't find anything to love ??????? see relationship overhead below.
a woman who's picky, sedentary, not particularly well-read, loves animals, slow-moving, appreciative sometimes but grudgingly, loves physical contact with you (foot/back rubs) as long as it's not usually sexual... This is what I refer to as relationship overhead, things I have to ignore or not let them effect me so much or find more ways to self sooth.
Some of the church members are calling us and I see BB taking an interest in some potential functions. Maybe some good changes are in the making.
