Well...if the statement is true "I don't wish to listen to your constant negativity, it wears me out." then say so....and leave her to deal with her own reactions and emotions from it.
This is exactly right. I was putting it in more colourful terms by saying "quit whining you miserable cow" and just really using that language both as a parallel to what Mojo said to her H and as a reflection of how much is p!isses you off to hear her all the time. In other words saying something like that would be an HONEST reflection of your feelings about it.
GEL has it right though, without being disrespectful you can tell her that you don't wish to listen because it wears you out. Then walk away so that the action matches the words. Just walking away on it's own plainly isn't getting through - telling her why you are walking away and then doing it might.
Fran
BTW: in Brit-speak cow is a very mild term of abuse to a female, girlfriends say it to each other all the time as in "you mad cow", it may be stronger in the US
if we can be sufficient to ourselves, we need fear no entangling webs Erica Jong
