Paul: Go to the ballet. Buy two tickets so she can come along if she chooses. Have a backup plan, however...perhaps a co-worker or friend, someone to whom you owe a favor, supermodel girlfriend, etc.
You know, I was thinking last night about how, when you withdrew, she seemed happier. Sometimes, when I think I am withdrawing, I will go through a thought process something like this: "I feel like touching her. Wait...she has been so distant/crabby/whatever to me lately, that she doesn't really deserve my affection, so I won't touch her. That'll teach her to be nicer/more affectionate/whatever to me." The thing is, as a physical touch love language guy, this type of treatment for being naughty would indeed work on me--if she stopped being physically affectionate with me as a consequence of my being crabby towards her, I'd immediately notice it, and would possibly be less crabby.
But my wife's love language is not physical affection. Me withdrawing my PA from her has little or no affect...it may even have a positive effect on her. I'm still not sure what her primary LL is, quality time, acts of service maybe. Of course, withdrawing either of those from my W leads to more conflict, not less, but that's because of the person she is.
Your W seems to thrive on gifts, or their equivalent, money spent to benefit her. Something to think about.
Hairdog, who notes that KC's minor league team, the T-Bones, is much more entertaining than the Royals.
