Got another email from H tonight. He explained that he's going to spend 4K on fixing his truck instead of buying a new vehicle. He explained the reasons for it and said he would keep it another few years so "we" got "our" money's worth out of it.
Both our vehicles are paid off now and H has been talking about replacing his truck for a few years now. My opinion is that we should keep the cars as long as we can and put off taking on a car payment. But, I have been nothing but supportive of H's desire to get a new vehicle. It's not unreasonable, his truck is over 10 years old, he makes descent money. And it is his money. I don't bring in the money he does (although that's largely because I have to job hop).
So now he sends me an email about how he's decided to keep his truck and he is explaining to me that he will be spending a large sum to get it fixed and even refering to that sum as "our" money. And none of this is out of character at all.
After all that I have read on these boards about the way spouses can screw up finances and be irrisponsible, here I have this guy who is beyond financially responsible. A financial PRINCE. A saint!
Yet, he can't say that he wants to be with me. He can't commit to us being a family again. He is so bent on making sure we are financially taken care of. But being emotionally or physically present just doesn't rate in his book.
I'm not responding to this email either, though. I still won't deny that there's some spitefullness in it. But I am also considering it a DB experiment. Except for when we weren't communicating at all, I have almost always responded to his emails right away. I have asked him to call more often, I have hinted that I need to hear his voice, I have thanked him after the few times he has called. But he still feels no need to call me when he has access to a phone and he knows I'm home. So we'll just see if going a few days, or several before responding to his emails makes him anymore likely to call. And I don't have a whole lot to lose at this point.
