Good for you, Opti. Make your moves based on what will be good for you. You moved to where you are for family support, and now you're ready to move again to where you can grow and flourish. If H doesn't live with you, married or not, why would it matter to him where you live? wouldn't it be just a plane ticket for him if he decides to see S4? Your sitch is different because H doesn't see S4 now except for his leaves, which doesn't seem to make a difference anyway.
If H does show up before his leave is over, there's no reason for you to be nice or kind to him. But what are your alternatives and what would that accomplish?
Live your life while you are still living. Riding the trail less traveled.
