Glad to hear she's back, now the real work begins. Have you and your W tried counseling? It sounds like you could use some marriage building advise. The first thing for you is to work on forgiveness. This is key, it's hard because I have to do this every single day, but in the long haul, I believe it will all be worth it.
I think for now, you need to take care of yourself. Try not to pressure and talk about your R. Try to go to counseling and work on what seems to be the core of why your W feels the need to have extramarital affairs. I also want you to be honest with yourself and decide if this is something that you can live with or not. That was a key question for me. Sometimes I think I can and other times I don't think so. For me, I take one day at a time, I forgive my H everyday and I try to remember the special times we had prior to his A and I know in my heart, that I don't want to be without my H so in order for me to be with him, I have to let go of the past and move forward. Work on today, tomorrow and our future. I can't change the past, but I can mold my future.
Take care of yourself and try to give your W a little space. She's confused as well. Try to be patient and see where your journey takes you.
