I know you know where I stand on what ImLIN is advising. All I can say, is once again, there are MANY different ways to deal with these situations. You can confront the cheater, you can decide not to. You can contact the OP, or not. You can move out, or not. You can ask them to leave, or not. You can file for divorce, or not. You can snoop, or not. You can obsess over the affair, or not. You can make ultimatums, or not... and ALL of these things, each opposite, is advocated by SOME expert, website or book. It's up to US to decide which path to take.
DB advocates a path that includes, among other things, NO snooping, NO obsessing over the affiar, NO confrontation, NO ultimatums, etc. This is NOT the most walked path to be sure, but then again, with divorce so prevalant in the world, maybe THIS is the path more people need to walk, who knows.
Anyway, Mama, while I disagree STRONGLY with the idea that somehow knowing more "truth" would help you in some way right now (mainly because I think you KNOW the truth, or all you NEED to know in terms of where YOU stand), ESPECIALLY if you have to snoop to find out, I do agree that at SOME point there will come a time when H will have to fess up. I would just hope, for your sake that it's sooner rather than later. You deserve THAT for sure.
