Mama,
I was trying to point out that your admitted over-analyzing is really completely within your control. You can choose to do it, or not. At times I spend a great deal of time and energy trying to decipher every word and action my W makes. It is darn exhausting. They feel fine but you're frustrated and fed up. That doesn't help things, does it. Sometimes we need to just take a well deserved break from it. It's not like they're going anywhere, I mean who else are they going to torture in such an intimate way. It takes years to build that up, do you think they'll throw it all away cuz we stopped analyzin for a week ! Seriously, to take a break is not giving up, it's recharging our batteries. It is a necessity. when its time to leave, if that day comes, I want it to be a decision made with a cool head not out of frustration and anger (I'm a dreamer, aren't I). So maybe yes, ignore it for a while. Whatever keeps you going until you can't anymore. Only you will know when that time is, noone else.
Regarding the exciting stuff, sometimes it's just a matter of doing something different. My W craves trying new things (I won't even go there! It's too easy), seeing new places, trying new foods. DB'ing is actually great preparation for what you are asking because it gets us to think outside the box re our R's. Use those tools to devise fun little things if $ are an issue. I remember one time my W had had a really rough day. I went upstairs, made her a bath, put candles around the bathtub, cut up some strawberries, brought a glass of wine and set up a cd player with some soothing music. I got a great big kiss and thank you for that. Now your hubby might not go for the bath thing (or maybe yes, who knows) but I'm just brainstorming here with you. Maybe it will ignite a better idea in your head. Be good...to yourself, Mama!

Divorced February 27, 2012.

"Only by love is love awakened".~ Ellen G White