EMILY 21

[RBinBR]

I guess I could deal with it being unfixable if he wasn't going to get remarried and possibly live happily ever after.
I mean if he does get remarried and live happily . . then that will just prove that it was all my fault this marriage didn't work.
I don't want to face that.
How will I deal with that?

Ah, let's return to the good ole standby of blame and fault. Emily, if you are ever to be truly happy, you're going to have to learn to let go of the past. The fact that your marriage is ending says nothing about how good or bad you are as a person. You are only a failure as a person if you choose to be. Nothing that has happened can prevent you from having the life of peace and joy that you desire, if you make the commitment to achieve it.

Emily, you absolutely need to change your focus, and I think that there are two things that would really benefit you, though you certainly don't have to take my advice (as you know, since I don't think you've taken any so far):

1. Get some girlfriends who will do things with you. Either find some other young moms, or some single girls who like kids, and go shopping or swimming or bowling ... or anything. If you form more close friendships with other women, you'll "need" your H less.

2) Get involved in a church ministry of other form of service. I don't know how difficult this is with your dad, but if it's difficult to go there, you may need to go somewhere else, but you need to actually be doing something beyond your family to make the world a better place. If you can start focusing on helping others and seeing their needs, your own needs seem much smaller. If you're involved in a program to help feed needy people, for example, you'll feel grateful that you have food to eat, and God will bless you and reward you for your service.