One more time: you don't know what will happen in the future. There's no need to resign yourself to anything more than accepting what is happening NOW. He is gone NOW - he might not stay gone. I know you are angry at him, but I think you are more angry with yourself. Forgive yourself. Work on truly loving and nurturing yourself before you worry about anything or anyone else. If, God forbid, something happened to your kids, you WOULD have something very special - and that's you. Now you need to work on finding, embracing and nurturing the growth of all that is so special and unique about you. You seem to find all of your self worth in what others think of you, and this simply is not true. You are worth far more than that.
This OW is no better than you are, in fact she's far lower and less of a woman than you. This is why he feels comfortable with her now, because he's not threatened being the low person his choices have made him when he's with her. You are the better person just by the nature of the role you are in in this situation. Own that. Prove that with every action you take.
“No problem can be solved from the same level of consciousness that created it. ” – Albert Einstein
