OK, you are a WONDERFUL catch. You are one of the sweetest people on these boards, and I cherish your advice and insight, ALWAYS.
Here's where I see you getting tripped up, as we all are. If your H is in MLC (which I think ALL WAS's have some sort of "on another planet" element), then he is NOT the same H you knew. You cannot hold him to those standards now. I do the same thing. I take things personally and get SO hurt, then think, this is NOT my H as he was. Until I see that person, and he says he was different, then I cannot be hurt. They are so ludicrosu...they lie even to themselves. My H contests that we had some "agreement" that dating during the demise of our M was OK (no such conversation).....but feels HORRIBLY guilty about things, b/c he KNOWS it's wrong.
They are at a battle with themselves...trust me, it doesn't seem so, but they are. There is a painful war going on within him, your analysis of right and wrong aren't even needed. It's taking care of itself.
You just sit back and trust that if this is SO out of character, the "old yet improved H will come back" and you just have to be patient. But, don't expect him to act like your H now, or a good one. It's just gonna drive you crazy.
