Not too much interaction with W lately. Talked to her other week and things got abit heated. Told her that ideally we would work things out and if she wanted to be part of it we could and I would be up for it. W said no way it's over, get used to it. I said that seeing what has happened and the way she has been acting lately that I can see that it is not going to work out and I will be giving up. W said I was contradicting myself. I tried to validate but ended up feeling like I was talking to a brick wall. W is seeng lawyers about splitting up the joint assets next week. Her father has to change his will and because her parents are tennants in common with us on the mortgage this is not a straight forward process.
Will be going to see a lawyer next week to see where I stand in regard to the division of assets. I do not want to give up what I am entitled to. I have been in this marriage for 18 years and am not going to relinquish what is rightfully mine. Earlier we talked and I said I'd just go for one third of the house equity, but now I feel I should also go for one third of the car, one third of the household goods (furniture, tv, fridge etc) and one third of the business I financed for her. Will see what lawyer says. As there are not a great deal of assets involved it might end up costng more than it is worth to fight it out in the courts.
Asked W if she wanted to got to an Indian festival with me today, Deepawali Mela (festival of lights). Just said "I'm going and would she like to come. If you don't want to I'm ok with that as I'm going anyway". She said she would like to go but said "Dont think we are getting back together, blah blah, blah". I guess she thinks I'm still pining for her.
At the moment I'm beining to feel a bit equanimious about the whole deal. I have been working on myself and getting to feel good about my life (except for the M & separation bit).
Going on nine months without a drink now. How time flys when you're having fun.
