Feeling my way around in the darkness

[NNP1965]

Nothing much happened last night. I was at hockey practice with the boys. Got home and H was working outside. We didn't get a chance to talk much. He fell asleep in front of the TV while watching a movie with DS12. I was working on a sewing project.

We all went to bed around 10:30. We did talk for a few minutes in bed. That is another thing I am thankful for. For the past several months I lay my head on his chest with his arm around my shoulders for a few minutes before we go to sleep every night. I started doing this, but now if I don't initiate it he does.

I still feel bad about snooping. I said something to the counselor that I did not knwo how he could act one way toward me and pretend everything is fine and then go do what he does on the computer.

She reminded me that I act like everything is fine and then go snoop. So I am convicted! she also said that what I am doing in secret is more constructive and what he is doing is more destructive, but it is still something each of us are doing in secret. Him on the computer, me at the counselor and here.

I got up early and came in to work to get some things done. I love coming in on a Saturday when not another sole is in the office. Guess I better get back to work though, got a busy family day once I get home.