Hi Ellie, thanks for checking on me...and all of you. I've been in kind of a whirlwind and funk....yesterday was a tough day....for some weird reason I was really down, just kept crying. Actually I got a lot of details (unsolicited) from H...and it stirred up a lot of mud. I don't have time to post much right now, will try to update tomorrow or Wednesday. I do believe that H and monster have parted ways, for the moment at least...I got these two emails from him today:(excerpts from emails here): I'm just having a tough day (talks about work-related stuff) Deb, I sure love you, you've always been there for me through the thick and the thin of it. I can't say that about one other single person on this earth! Thanks for your love, care and support! Your H
when I replied I thanked him for his patience yesterday...then got this back... It's okay Deb, yesterday was just a strangely down day. Oh well, I agree maybe this weekend will be a really nice one! You don't have to worry about the monster, truly I've had it with her and told her as much! There is nothing she could say to sway me back, I see the liar for what she is! I love you and I'm sorry for all the crap earlier. Your H
So, I don't know....I have seen this so many times before, but other than this outburst, he seems so much more unemotional about her, that it does give me some hope that perhaps this is really, finally it. I sent an email back saying that I was guessing that she was in contact today, I havent heard anything back after that....but I can smell it a mile away after all this time.
We do actually have 2 activities planned (recreational besides sex) at H's idea, believe it or not....one for this weekend...one for in November....that is a big big change, although it will be family stuff, the kids with us, and probably his folks on one...but that is such a change from the days he hid out from any contact....
on the weight side, I have my fingers crossed....I started a diet called medifast a week ago today....I have actually managed to stay with it....and my weigh day isnt till tomorrow, but yesterday I was so discouraged I got on the scale....at the "heavy" time of day for me (I can weigh 10 lbs different at different times of day) and fully clothed ( I usually do it in my bday suit, scary as it is)and my weight was about 2 lbs lower than it had been. So we shall see. my fingers are crossed. and toes.
House is improving in teeny tiny increments. very teeny and tiny sometimes. but at least moving in the right direction. Finances, maybe a bit better...too soon to tell, except maybe I have a clearer picture of where to start.
