Finding her way back -- how? Part 2

[25yearsmlc]

Alex,

Now this is up my alley. Re: how to laugh hard and often:
first of all, LET GO and do it. I have no idea why people hold laughter in, it's like holding back on an orgasm....

ANYHOW, try reading a book by Judy Carter called The Comedy BIble or her first book, The Stand UP Comedy Workbook, both of which are the textbooks used in stand up workshops here in LA. You do NOT have to be a comedian to get something out of the books. On the contrary, they also remind us to see the humor in every day life, including our dark days. Also to express it more so our lives are enriched, as well as the lives of those around us.
2nd, rent or buy comedy movies. If you can do that with your W, all the better. If not, do it for yourself and she'll see the lighter side of you. You can merely refer to the movies/comedies and she'll see a difference. I'm originally from northern Virginia and know that there are comedy clubs around there and in DC. If you can take her to see a good comedian, (not one who does too much "blue" humor, which is usually sexual and can make people uncomfortable, you want the Ellen DeGeneres, Jerry Seinfeld or Jay Leno types (yes, they ALL still do stand up, fyi) or just someone who is more "prime time" so you feel at ease.

An improv class is great for 2 things, losing inhibitions by the willingness to be goofy, and being able to think on your feet faster which is mostly for auditions. The improv classes will not however, help you to be wittier. Maybe faster, with you wit, but improv is more physical than Stand up, and is based on no preparation ahead of time. Stand up, requires your own material that has to be authentic for you. FYI, my last "gig" was based on my H's MLC and it went over well. Guess lots of people have R problems and some of them are universal.

As for the OM possibility; if she has not had a PA with him, she may be imagining something that is not at all based on reality. Even if she has had a PA, (and I'm NOT saying I think so!) it's not over for you yet.

Your W loves you, and if she trusts that your changes are real, you have so much going for you. When your W asked for the sep, who moved where and what reason(s) did she give at the time? I know some of what she says now, but has she been consistent?

Take care,
j-




g out