An interesting perspective....

[PArob]

There are times when I just sit and think and today is no excpetion. Something that has been really bothering me is this. My W, just like many of the other WAW's on here, had experienced the intense emotion of what they considered either to be love or a strong attraction to someone other than us. For some us, and GH you're included in this, our W's have expressed that desire to hold on to the M and try to work through the issues, but continue to hold onto that romantic attraction to the OP. Typically, this involves a period of depression and/or withdrawal, which many of us see as backslides in the advancement of the R, but in reality, it seems to be the natural progression of things.

Here's something though that is particularly troublesome in my case. Just as anyone else, my W has had to process those emotions and feelings, and has had a hard time doing that because, well whether its her personality or genetic disposition, she was more akin to internalize the emotions and her coping mechanism is centered around food, or lack thereof. The major problem is, she just isn't able to articulate and cope with feelings.

So, here I am today....wondering what it is that I need to do to make things right. If this were a normal course of events, I would say that utilizing DB skills and building attraction between the couple would be the perfect way to go, but in my instance I can't even say if that's right. Its so hard to just understand what to do. I know that if she were to go, she probably wouldn't be happy, if she stays, she's giving up on the perception of wanting something different. In the meantime, she's committing slow suicide. How can I stop this endless loop??

Its very frustrating and today is really no exception...although thanks to the kindness of those here yesterday, I am in a much better place today. I am really coming to terms with the idea that my W needs me to be there for her, but not to have expectations for her to be there for me at this point. She just isn't in that place yet and hopefully, with enough positive influence....she can be one day.