I don't like zingers, Cobra. They hurt. Polite sarcasm is the worst. If I sent one your way with my comments, I apologize. But I'd appreciate it if you'd tell me when I do it and what I've said, so I know, and then that way I can be more careful in the future.
Well this is interesting to me that you felt this was a “zinger.” I guess I can see how you can take it that way, but what I was intending was more along the lines of male “joshing” around, acknowledging that you truly have “evolved” to a higher level than myself. Think of it more like bowing to the big dog but in an off-handed way. I think difference in how you interpreted my comment and how men might interpret it is more a product of male/female socialization (did any men take my comment as offensive?)
At any rate, it is minor, not worthy of making and issue out of and I’m sorry if I hurt or insulted you. BUTTTT, just for the sake of learning more about each other and the sexes, do you know that your statement to me (asking that I tell you when you’ve sent me a zinger so that you can be more careful) feels like distancing? It is a subtle wall and one which men would not put up, especially if they were “bonding” (not saying that is what we were doing).
Defining these understood limits of propriety and respect is a woman thing, IMO. I think women tend to run scared with strangers and such walls give comfort so they feel safe to bond. Men do not have such insecurity and bond by encroaching on and testing each other, just like boys who wrestle. If a man were to make the same request as yours, he might very likely be typecast as a “girly man.”
Yeah, yeah, I know, now I'm minimizing your hurt. Sorry. OK, enough of the tangent….
Why don't you give it a go. Here. Me and the gals will help you out, and at least for my part, I promise to be gentle with you.
OK. I’ll start a new thread. Where would you like to start?
