Quote: If you mean afraid as in me not taking on the leadership role you speak of, I can see/understand that.
That could very well be it. But as a man, I could see how one would begin to resent having to 'lead,' when inside he may think..."why do I have to have all the answers? What if I just don't KNOW?"
That can be an extreme amount of pressure for someone. I feel it as a single mom. Some of the best advice I ever got from someone once was... 'when in doubt, at least ACT like you know what you are doing.' That doesn't mean you aren't open to ideas, or some correction or modification... but the whole notion of 'acting as if,' sets a postive mind frame that, while right now I don't know... I have FAITH and respect myself enough that I will figure it out.
It brings courage to those around you.
And I think it is a lovely idea to start treating your W as more of a girly girl. Quite lovely indeed. Let me know how that goes.... be gentle and consistent, firm, but loving. She is probably going to balk, and not believe you at first. Just stick with it. She may even turn on you a time or two for it, for it will be utterly foreign to her. Help her succeed. It will become its own motivation for her... and in the process, you will be learning how to lead.
