Anger towards self is what leads to depression. That is what is glaringly missing from this article. It speaks of the boss chewing you out and feeling the unfairness of that. Sometimes the boss chews you out totally fairly and you feel angry at yourself. Of course you blame shift and pretend that's not what you're feeling which is what leads it to get all twisted up.
Step 1: f*ck up
Step 2: get chewed out (or other form of negative feedback)
Step 3: seek someone/something else to blame
Step 4: feel martyred
Step 5: feel underlying sense of low self-esteem
Step 6: feel hopeless and depressed
If at step 3 one was mature enough to say "yes, I was dumb, lazy, forgetful, mean" or whatever. "the other person has a perfect right to call me on it - I will try to do better". Then there would be very little loss of self-esteem, the pain would subside quickly, and the real problem could be addressed.
Radical honesty in the workplace
Why was this work a piece of crap?
Because I'm thicker than I look
Because I was suffering a bad case of don't-give-a-sh!t-itis
Because I'm lazy and I come to work to gossip and surf the web
Because I have the memory of a flea and I put it together at the last minute when it suddenly dawned on me it was due.
"Always admit to a fault, it confuses those in authority and gives you time to make yet more mistakes" - Mark Twain
Fran
if we can be sufficient to ourselves, we need fear no entangling webs Erica Jong
