Once again, I don't see how I could happily oblige with his request and yet still project lack of confidence about my sexuality and appearance.
Dunno, why don’t you just ask him?
This is true but it's also true that context does matter. I am 100% confident that if I was in the company of a man who was giving off "I am hot for you" vibes, I wouldn't be giving off any "lack of confidence about my appearance vibes".
… but I am conditioned to be inhibited about making all the sort of natural little moves I might make with a HD man.
And it sounds like he has the same inhibitions with you when you are not fully confident. Your insecurity seems to breed his insecurity. Conversely, like the Dog Whisperer claims, calm assertiveness in the owner creates calmness in the dog. But then, that makes sense within the understanding of relationship dynamics, doesn’t it? Maybe your H is really more tuned into your emotions than you realize?
