Like most people, my W exhibits some of the traits of adult children of alcoholics, although not all. A couple of the bigger ones she has are low self-esteem, feeling guilty for doing things for herself (hobbies, etc.), and putting everyone else's feelings before her own. Don't get me wrong...these are very subtle, but definately there. One of her explanations for what's going on is that she feels that for once she has to take care of herself..blah, blah, blah. She's even convinced herself that our D7 would be better off in a divorced family than if we stay together in an "unhappy" marriage. I'm sure some of that is coming from the OM, who has not just one, but 4 kids. I'm trying to understand her issues and where she is coming from, because, like it or not, because of our D7 neither of us can just walk away. We still have to have a relationship on some level...so I'm doing the rope-a-dope, hoping she comes to her senses. Plus...I've added about 20lbs to my bench press.
