I think that you need to find someone (professional) to talk to - people on here can't help you at the moment
what's happened is everyone gets wrapped up in your problems and trying to help you out they identify with you and how you feel and become attached to Emily - right now you are not handling things too well and that is where everyone is getting emotional its not because they don't care its because they care too much they can't do much for you except post replies but the more out of control your emotions become the more helpless everyone is hence trying anything at all to drag you out of this total funk you are in
no one is giving up on you Emily so don't give up on yourself
when you read this post please get out the phone book and call someone for help do you have phone counselling in the states? in Australia we have lifeline - you need someone who is emotionally unattached from you and your situation who can listen but be more objective
please promise you will find someone you can go and talk to
as I said before only Emily can help Emily only you get to make the choices you need to only you get to live with those choices
at the moment you are so focused on Kevin that you have remarrying and having a family - that may be or it may not
you have forgotten all the principles of DBing looking for proof of what you are thinking working on getting a life for yourself
by setting goals such as I will not call him you set yourself up for failure Emily a better goal is to not call for two hours and then half a day but you cannot do this alone Emily
the reality is you recently had a baby and that alone can tip your world on its axis
please find someone with expertise in these matters to help this is much more than just your marriage breaking up you cannot do this alone
