Getting Back To EMILY . . . hopefully!!

[Sandy_wants_to_try]

Going along with DBing rules... if something isn't working - change it. We need to do a 180 on how we're communicating to Emily, because this ain't working.

We cannot compare ourselves to her because she is sooo much younger than us. Do you guys remember how you were at 22? I do. Although I thought I was a ready-made woman - I still thought that 30-year-olds were old. I was an adult then. 2, 3, 5, 8 years was still a REALLY long time!

Emily. Breathe. Could you maybe keep off this board for a few hours. Go do something with the girls. You need to stop the spiral.

Why does everything have to be now? Do you really have to think about this (... being single for the rest of your life, not having sex for 6 months) all RIGHT Now? Do you need the answers right now? Can it wait till next week?

Could it wait just a few days? Figure it out later. One week isn't the end of the world, right?

Do you think you could push those thoughts aside just for a little while. Try it. Everytime you feel them popping up. Say to yourself. Not Now. I won't think of this right now. I can deal with it next week. And then distract yourself.

If you get caught up in all of these negative thoughts, that swirling hole beneath you (and I know that hole) is just going to get so much bigger.

You don't have to think about not having sex right now. Can you survive not having sex for another week? Yes, right? So don't think about it till next week.

Can you survive not talking to H until next week? Then don't think about it till next week.

Can you point your brain at positive things for just one little week? Just stop thinking about being a single mom at 22 for a few days. Then do it.

Next week you'll think about alll this stuff, OK?
In the meantime, do everything you can to stop yourself from thinking about it... go to the park, distract yourself. Watch movies, read fiction books. Distract yourself so you don't think about it.

Then we'll talk again next week. Is that OK?