Quote: I don't want to be "leading" my H on . . . but I need to see if he's going to change and stay that way! I don't want to turn him out or tell him that I "can't" be in a R with him . . . not now that he ACTUALLY wants to be with me.
You're still making this all about what HE wants. Are you willing to make choices to go after what YOU want, even if it means that he chooses to walk away? This is the point - it's a big shift in perspective for you. If you continue to try to make your decisions based on what he wants, where will you be? He wants to be with you, great. Does he know whether you want to be with him? Is that a given? Do you even know?
Basically, you're confirming that he can do whatever he wants to, whenever he wants to and you're always going to want him. In doing this, you're giving up you personal power. You're giving up on yourself. Respect yourself - respect your right to make your choices for you happiness. He certainly won't respect you unless you respect yourself first. Don't be afraid of losing the opportunity to be with him. If he truly wants to be with you, this won't change in a short period of time. Let him convince you that he does want this, and that he's willing to work for it.
“No problem can be solved from the same level of consciousness that created it. ” – Albert Einstein
