Wow. Your post was brilliant. Utterly brilliant. Yes, yes, and YES.
Soak it up, Chrome. Combine it with this, from Bear:
Quote: As a woman raised to be a "good" girl, much of my life was spent feeling like sex was something that men wanted to take from me, or were waiting for me to give them. We never talked about sex when I was growing up except the idea was very clear that good girls don't. There were no PDA's between my parents. I was also raised to believe that to want or need anything for yourself makes you selfish. So, when I got to college and met a man I thought I loved, it was all about pleasing him. I didn't really allow myself to have fantasies. I could never come up with one when asked. I was too worried about what people might think of me. Got to keep up the appearance of good girl.
