I feel the need to clarify my remarks on happiness. Firstly my remarks were indeed a rant they were not directed at you are your sitch Helping2heal. I'm sorry if they came across as such. But I do believe that happiness is a way overdone concept. What is happiness? If I was happy today but not happy yesterday does that make me a happy or unhappy person? If my w's fooling around yet my kids bring me great joy, am I happy or unhappy? Often, I think happiness is what we make it. In my sitch I can turn it into the ugliest most unbearable situation possible or I can concentrate on growing as a person, improving for my w and kids, developing new interests and skills etc. I am not an unhappy person. I wish my W would return my love and leave her affair but that isn't going to be, not today. Her words to me were "just because I took a vow does that mean I don't have the right to be happy?" My point was, in the previous post, her "happiness" has caused extreme duress for others and put her families welfare in peril. How can one be happy knowing the kind of pain that is being inflicted upon those around you? I told her I could not see anything beautiful in this A because it was rooted in shame and deceit. How could it bring happiness? I guess it's a complicated thing this happiness. Again, I apologize if my remarks seemed personal towards your sitch. I'm feeling happier already!
