I'll be completely honest - and I'm a cheater too. Only once, but isn't that enough??? I read your post and tried to keep an open mind. You are young and just trying to figure life and love out.
However, the one thing that hit me in the gut that I could not get past was your sig.
"Live life without Fear, Apology, or Regret. You have a right to be who you are."
Damn. That sounds like my OW mantra. I'm not going to get into to it too much, but she constantly says, "I have a right to feel what I feel, be who I am and want what I want."
Yes live life without fear. But do so without apology or regret? How will you ever learn or help those you have hurt? If I had that mantra, I would still be with the OW with my wife is stuck raising three kids on her own. The first step to true knowledge is knowing we know nothing.
You obviously want to do the right thing or you would not have posted here. Much like me you found out that you did not get bashed as much as you thought.
I am the last person to tell you how to make and keep a marriage, but you have sooo many potentially happy years ahead of you. I think you need to do some soul searching. Yes life would be grand if we could be happy. I envy those who are. However, there are others in the big ol' world who we may step on to get to our happiness.
I'm not trying to bash you at all. You could read my situation and rightfully bash me. HELL I had an affair while my wife was at home with our 3 year old daugther and pregnant with twins nonetheless! Trust me I have not been a saint.
But before you make any decisions, I think you need to look at yourself and your worldview.
Take this with a grain of salt. Hope it helps and good luck in life's journey. We will never know all the answers. As soon as we think we do, we are shutting out all life has to offer.
You seem to have been very honest. I have a couple of questions. What was your family life like? Did you come from a split home? Where you abused (I know that is personal. You don't have to answer if you do not want to). Was your dad a good father?
Not trying to pry. You came here for help. I may not be able to offer you any, but knowing these details may shed some light on what makes you tick.
