Hello everyone, I am new to this post. And to give a quick introductory, here goes my story:
My husband’s affair came to a halt when I busted him in October 2005. I’m not sure how long it had been going on…I suspect two months or less. The gal fell in love with him and he too was telling her that he loved her. He says he was just telling her what she wanted to hear so he could get only one thing from her. Says he was deprived at home and was “weak” when she approached him with all the charm! Anyways……I have been trying to get over this ordeal to no avail. I constantly think about what he did and I get angry. Since I wear my emotions on my sleeve, he can tell when I’m happy, angry, sad, etc. He doesn’t like conflict, so he doesn’t react kindly to my ever changing moods.
Just yesterday we got into it because he was outside chatting with our neighbor (single, female with grown children). She had paid him a compliment earlier and next thing you know he wasn’t around for a while. I went outside to see if he was talking to her and he was. Well…….needless to say I got mad! Then he got mad because he said that he feels he’s always walking on eggshells. I told him that I felt threatened and started getting panicky and that I needed his reassurance. He says that it pushes him away when I act like that. He says he’s tired of me watching his every move and checking up on him. He says I can trust him and that I have nothing to worry about. But I don’t trust him.
I would like to know what steps I can take to start the forgiving process and not dwell on what happened. It makes me so sick when I start thinking about it. Sometimes I can’t stand my husband for what he has done and I find it hard to be lovey and kissy like he wants me to be.
