Hey GH, I too have been away,but have checked in from time to time because it DOES help me sometimes. Only thing i can say is after all you have been through, and if your W ever does realy come around,believe me, THE HARDEST WORK IS YET TO COME. I personally am still at a point where i dont think i am going to make after 2 months of my W showing me love like never before... after the A.In a way i think that is what makes it worse.I am now just so angry at what happened and why, that i dont know what to do. So my advice to you would be that i think it is time that YES, you do need to take a stand, either you leave or her leave, but you should not have to share your W with anyone. This is why i dont give advice alot,because i am afraid someone will actually take it,but that is how i see it from here,and personally think the only way you, as well as her will know what you want.She needs to see life without GH! Who is going to be there when she needs something..him NO! What about the kids when she needs something and you are not there.will it be him...No! More than likely it will be him running away when he thinks he actually has to commit to a woman with a family,and actually may have some real responsibilities because of it.Let her go to him,and see what a real man HE IS NOT! Your the only MAN in her life, and as soon as you take that away from her, it will hit her..YES there will be much pain for you,and maybe the kids..but personally (i do respect you very much for hanging in there like you have)if you had done something like this when this all started you may be in the same position as me right now.Trying to understand how someone can love me so much now,and want to spend every minute with me, and you be the one wondering if you want it to work. The ball will soon be in your court, and it WILL be you who decides whether YOU want your marriage,and if you can live with what has happened. 3 months ago i would have given my left arm to be where i am today, but now question how i can make it another day,until my anger and resentment subside.....and will it ever? Anyway GH...sorry for the probably bad advice..but that is just how i see it. BEST OF LUCK!! DeeJay
