I don't think I've ever read your thread before, but this just caught my eye:
Quote: Now, I feel like I dont' mesure up to the standar of a woman's body he now might have, of course other than denying he did anything physical and appologyzing about going there he hasn't reassured me about how he feels about me physically. OK, I know they are in no position of reassuring even themselves, but it makes me feel so worthless and unattractive, that spark I had, that desire to please him and touch him feels odd now, it doesn't feel right.
This was a huge issue for me b/c my H was really into online porn. I already had body image issues, and this was just the icing on the cake. It made me never want to have sex with him b/c I thought he was just comparing me to women with perfect bodies. I have two kids and bf for a total of six years. And I don't have any silicone in me! Believe you me, I really do know how you're feeling.
What's helped me is to remind myself that I have more to offer than hugs tits that stick straight out of my body. And honestly, if that's what my H wants, I don't want him. It doesn't reflect on YOU; it reflects on him and his unrealistic view of women OR his own low self-esteem (if he's even attracted to that in real life, which is what I think you are assuming).
The other thing that's helped me is yoga. I've been doing it for a few years, and it's really helped me to love and respect my body for what it is. Our bodies are beautiful, even if they're not "perfect."
~Nicola
Life isn't about finding yourself; it's about creating yourself My thread: Trusting God's Plan
