Quote: You've said several times that this is why you're not going to let him see them, because he's abusive and he might hurt them. You want it both ways, Emily, but that doesn't work. Either last week you were willing to put your kids' safety at risk because of your own selfish emotional needs, or he's not really an abuser and you're creating something to punish him. There is no other way.
I've been thinking about this . . . .
Maybe he would hurt them.
He has a hard time controlling his temper. I guess that's a judgement call. It depends on what you consider abuse (and anymore it's hard to draw a line. . . spanking?!?!?! I don't think that spanking is abuse but there's a line where too much or too hard could be.)
He has a bad temper and a hard time controlling himself (he's always said that when he's hit me or whatever in the past he blanks out and doesn't even know what he's doing until it's done.)
I guess maybe I just figured as long as we were all together I was his main target . .
since the split he's been different that temper hasn't been there with me . . . I even commented on that while he was here this weekend. Then later that day he scared the crap outta me. . .
ANYWHO . .
I guess I figured he would never hurt them because I would always be there to protect them.
I've told him since the day that Felina was born, "If you ever touch her wrong I am divorcing you and taking your balls with me."
You get the point . . . I guess I always knew it could happen but just always assumed it never would.
Maybe I thought I could protect them. . .
I never thought about it as putting them in danger though . . . never once.
Sure there were times over past six months where I asked him to tone it down with Felina . . . he'd get mad and say that she wasn't a baby anymore etc.
He never crossed the line with them . . so I always thought it would be fine.
