Moving Along OR Just Spinning My Wheels?

[RBinBR]

Fair enough I'll accept responsibility for the times that it was warrented because "I got in his way"
I never tried to wrestle him out of a doorway or anything . .
EITHER WAY . . . I'll accept resposibility for those times.

I don't think that begins to excuse some of the times that he has gotten physical with me though.
Maybe I'm wrong.

You still don't get it, do you? The life of a well-adjusted person isn't about blame. The life of a victim IS about blame, because one who chooses to live life as a victim is determined to fail and be able to point the finger at someone else for it. Choose not to blame. Choose to honestly examine your own life and become the person you want to be, so that you can have the life you want. Emily, no one is going to "give you" the life you want. No prince is riding in on a white horse. If you want a great life, then you have to become a great person.

Emily, a week ago I asked you to honestly assess whether you truly wanted to be married to your H, and you were 100% sure that you did. Now that he's (for now) decided to be with someone else, you are 100% sure that you don't ever want him again. A week ago, he was a wonderful person who was suffering temporary insanity, and now he's an abuser who needs to be kept from his own kids.

But, Emily, nothing really changed. He'd been cheating before and he's still cheating. What's different is your wild emotions! You need to get some kind of grip on yourself and figure out what kind of person you are. If he was so abusive that he needs to be kept from the kids, why the hell were you so desperate for him to live with them a week ago? If he is so abusive, why did you put your own emotional neediness ahead of your kids' safety?

I'm not letting you off the hook on this one, Emily.