Babysteps or my imagination???

[cat03]

honey, it's never easy to know what to do in this situations, no one (but a councelor perhaps) would know what to do, so dont' feel bad, I'm no expert either, each sitch is very different.
The fastest more forward way to do so is to have the talk and cut down contact, I'm not saying it's the way you should go, but that that's the quickest way to pull away. Or you could just cut down calls & visits w/him, of course the kids are another thing, they should still be able to call/talk/visit their dad as usual, and then if he confronts you then you tell him why.

I dont' own the DB book anymore, but I'd def. suggest to check out the "going dark" chapter, I honestly forget what it says. Above all, do what feel rights to you. I never believed on counselors nor therapy, but it saved my sanity and it helps our M now, have you considered going by yourself? I'd do you a world of good. I used to go to a woman's group sponsored by the county and it was a life saver.

I did read the part about the dinner, and I agree w/you, dont' mention it if he doesnt', see if he remembers and if this is still an important date for him.

I'll keep an eye on you and keep you in my prayers if you go dark, one way or another you will learn to take control of your life, you wont' be in this unhealthy limbo, you will choose to be happy, you can do it)))))))))))))))))