We are doing fine. A little boring (ok a lot boring) but overall hangin in there. I have completely and utterly succumbed to my H's sexual style and frequency. Whatever he wants, he gets. Whenever he wants it, he gets it. I no longer try to seduce at ALL. Interestingly, this does not bother me. It is simply not worth the fight. Sure we drummed up a lot more passion back in the days of full-on SSM wars, but we also had a lot more lows. Now I just absolutely go with his flow and nurture myself as best as I can. It is working for us, so far. I have no idea what H really think of it, as he is confrontation-phobic so I rarely know his true feelings. I get a "mask" that falls over his face and that's about it. I used to try to deduce things from body language, etc, but no longer. If he wants to talk, he will. If not, then we'll just roll along with life!
Cobra, my question is for you. My mother has become more and more self absorbed over the years. I assumed it was due to my father's rampant alcoholism and her (legitimate) need to make a life for herself that was not in any way dependent on him for anything. My grandmother, her mom, has always been severely narcissistic and has the whole Angry Feminist thing going on. One day, about a year ago, I asked my mom how she stood this when she was young. She replied, You know HP, she wasn't like this when I was young. She was just a regular mom. I asked what happened and she said she didn't know.
So for some reason I did not make the connection between my mom's self absorption and my grandma's. I guess because my gma is mean and cranky and my mom isn't. So my mom's took on a martyr quality to it...poor mom has to get wrapped up in her own life because dad is lost in drink.
Nowadays my mom is SO wrapped up in herself that it's hard to be around her. (this is not due to being a recent widow, btw, she's been like this for years) I had intended to write a message to you asking, Is it possible for people to acquire narcissistic tendencies as they age?, but you were on vacation. Imagine my surprise when I logged on today and saw that very sentence from you.
So then the realization hit me that if my grandma 'passed' it on to my Mom, did my mom..gulp..pass it on to me? I will absolutely croak if I wake up one day to discover that I'm doing this to my own kids.
