My marriage isn't swelling with passion but neither is it DOA. It's probably what people refer to as "normal life"...we connect passionately at times and other times barely have time for each other at all.
We moved into a new house 2 months ago and have been busy as heck getting adjusted. In addition to that, H is single handedly gutting and remodeling our kitchen, including new electric, plumbing, walls, ceiling, wood floors, sink, faucet, appliances, you get the picture. It's keeping us waaaaay busy.
About 3 weeks after we moved in, I went to CO for 5 days to visit my sister. While I was gone, H built up some massive desire for me. I came back to a person I hadn't seen in years. He was downright aggressive and not inhibited whatsoever. It was amazing! Then life intervened again (poison ivy--he gets it worse than anyone I've ever seen) and we drifted back into dullsville again.
The good news is that I believe I'm having some hormonal whackiness again and the degree to which I care has gone way down. I mean, I care, but I'm not all that tore up about it. Some days I could take it or leave it, which isn't like me at all. My hair is falling out again so I need to go see a doctor soon. Last year, when my hair did this crazy stuff I waited until it was actually thinning on top (shudders with horror) before I made the appointment and then had to cancel it due to insurance problems. (that is, our insurance sucked, LOL)
Last week, I went to CO again and came home to an aggressive mate again. So absence does make his something grow something, that much is obvious. I'm not sure how I can capitalize on this but I did go to a party alone on Saturday night. He got extremely jealous, for some weird reason, and ended up calling me at the party and demanding that I come home. ??!?!?!??! It was at my female cousin's house so there was no logical reason for him to act like that. Whatever, I said. I was not mad or upset or anything--I just looked at him and shook my head at how ridiculous he was being. I absolutely refused to get down in the pit with him and before I knew it, he was out and pawing lustily all over me. Men!
We also got into a discussion about marital boredom. During one of my brutally honest moments I told him that I was verrrrrrrry bored but overall happy and content with my life with him. I had to steer back the topic of conversation about 10 times, no joke, as he kept trying to steer it from being about our marriage to being about our "life" which includes of course, our kids and home and new move and all.
Anyway, I suppose you could sum up this update in the following way: 1. W has possible hormone problems 2. H is severely preoccupied with pressures of house remodel 3. Still managing to connect with decent frequency, though the QT has vanished and intimacy is in short supply.
All in all, we are trying to connect with each other and are having varying levels of success. I'm hopeful that a doctor can help me sort out why my flippin hair is flippin fallin out again. And hopeful that he/she can help me determine the reasons for my sudden emotional flatlinedness. As some of my long time SSM friends know, I'm up or down but not indifferent!
The kiddiepots are all fine. Enjoying the summer and testing my sanity daily.
