I definately fall into the category of the spouse tht WANTS the most from the R. I think Adny is right that it's true for most people on this board.
But..if we stop acting like we care as much as we do and stop trying then the R is dead in the water, so I think we're kinda stuck in this position until they start to change, and if tis is true what motivates them to change if they feel like they have control over the R.? I'm sure most of them like it that way. I don't make wine, but I love to drink it! Rachael
