LL - what difference would it make? Betrayal is betrayal. Read my story on "Valentine's Day massacre - take 3". The infidelity early in our relationship - it really wasn't the single night of sex that hurt so much as the 6 months of long distance communication and pining for her that he kept hidden from me. It's the lying and the emotional part of the affair that hurts the most - so it's really almost besides the point if it ever progressed to a physical affair. If it never did - well, that may show that he had enough respect for your marriage to hold off from that last step. If it did become a PA, and he's lying about it - well, he may be lying about it because he fears telling the truth would cost him his relationship with you. Don't focus on the wrong things - it was an innapropriate relationship that damaged your marriage, and you need to let him know that's not okay, even if it never did become a physical thing. Ellie
