Shes leaving. There is nothing that i can do about it. She will be gone a week after i come back. All 3 of our kids will be with me for 5 months and then I will send my daughters home to be with their mother. She intends on having the divorce papers drawn up within 6 months.

I cheated. I did and I ackowledge it. I feel horrible for what I did to contribute to the destruction of my family. She says she does not love me and that she has no interest in me, that we will never be together, so dont bother her with questions or statements to work it out. She just gets mad and hangs up when I do.

I am scared. Not to make any excuse for what i did, but this is not entirely fair. I have forgiven her for her affair. It was horrible. She went out with her friends and I knew what she wass intending to do. I did not think that she would actually go through with it. I called her cellphone while she was getting into a cab with him and I begged her not to do it. She laughed at me and then I heard him laughing also. She hung up and I called her back about 30 minutes later and she wass in his rooom and said that she was busy and hung up. The next morning I called her around noon and he did not have a car to bring her home. So i had to go and pick her up. I heard him asking her if she wanted him to walk with her to where I was supposed to meet her at.

I picked her up, with our children in the back and I was so hurt that I couldnt say a word the whole way home. But I forgave her. Then 2-3 weeks later she told me that she was pregnant. The whole time that she wass pregnant I did not knwo if it was mine or the other mans. When she had our daughter it was a lot to accept. And the whole time, she never said once that she was sorry. I cheated then. And i felt horrible. I did not want to be with another woman one minute. But, every time i would go home my wife would tell me to get out. That she hated me etc, etc etc.

I moved out for 1 and a half months with another woman. Not the best part of my life. I would go home every day to see our children and to beg my wife to let me come home.

She told me that she never did sleep with the other man and that she got drunk and passed out. She didnt and she had not intended to do anything with him. She made me feel so much like a piece of s--t.

Well, anyway. Once i was here in Iraq for about 2 months, she tells me that the kids had their blood drawn today and that she was so relieved that our youngest blood tpe was something because that meant that it couldnt be his. I was floored. She was so convincing in her lie and I totally believed her. I demanded that we get one of those online paternity tests. I went home that night in shock. But I went to sleep and when I woke up, I realized that I truly loved her and that no matter what that was my daughter. I didnt need results of a test to tell me that she is my little girl.

I have forgiven her for this, so why is it not in her heart to forgive me? She say sthat because of what I have done, that it made her not love me anymore. That any changes that I may have made or that no matter how much I love her that she will never want to be with me again.

So I guess Im asking you out there, anyone, is this unsalvageable? Is this a situation that cant be busted? Is this a case that cant be saved by just one partner?
Is my life really over?