Though I haven't been on here in a while, I need to vent. Hubby and I started counseling with a marriage counselor a few months ago, but not been to counseling lately because our counselor had an accident, and I haven't been in touch with her, but will call her tomorrow to see if she's doing better. Last week, we had sex, WHICH MAKES IT TWO TIMES THIS YEAR NOW, (how sad!), and it was great for him, but he claimed he was too tired to even bother giving me oral sex. Tonight, I wanted to have sex with him, but he didn't say anything, just got this blank look on his face. He's asleep, I'm up.
I know we need A HELL OF A LOT more counseling, as we just got into it, but I am so tired of his false promises (We'll try as much as we need to!) and his rejecting me. This is why I don't even bother initiating sex because I'm tired of being rejected. He will be out of town later this month, and I actually entertained thoughts of having an affair while he is gone. Yes, that's how bad it's gotten. If he's not attracted to me, I wish he would just say it and move on. If he has a low desire, I'd like for him to find out. I am trying to hang in there, but I am becoming more and more frustrated and ready to leave. The sad thing about it is he is doing something called re-evaluation counseling, which is peer-to-peer counseling for free, but HE DOESN'T COUNSEL ABOUT THE LACK OF SEX IN OUR MARRIAGE. I am so tired of this. Like I wrote, I will call the marriage counselor to see if she is well enough to see us soon. Otherwise, I'll just be here, suffering. My husband just doesn't get it.
