Quote: Very often the lesson is just learning how to feel ok in our own skins without needing the apporval of someone else.
Strange thing in reading your last post, Frank, is that I was having trouble figuring out what you were telling ME. Then I read the previous response post from Flip and said, "Ahhhh...."
I feel OK in my own skin as long as I am not in the presence of my W. Even that is getting better each day. Each day I recapture more of me whom I lost in my M and I embrace that person so that he will be the one who interacts with my W and children going forward. I do have value as a person. THAT is huge for me to be able to say abaout myself. The real challenge is keeping those feelings about me in the forefront of my mind so that they are the NORM for me and the feelings I fall back on in my crisis of a sitch.
Sorry - to go back and rehash this - I missed it earlier.
What I have learnt, I think, is about control and unconditional love. I can't make my H love me. All can do is exercise unconditional love for him and hope he comes back.
Even if it doesn't work out the way I want, at least I will feel proud of my own actions.
You cannot teach a man anything; you can only help him discover it in himself. Galileo Galilei
