Quote: HH, I want to make sure that your faith is in the fact that God will provide you with a life you can handle and that you can prosper in should you choose to because one of the most difficult parts of all this is in the acceptance that it may just not be meant to be. I am NOT saying give up hope, but I feel like you are expressing an expectation that things will work out between you and W as a matter of faith.
To me, and this is just my focus on words/semantics, the thing to have is HOPE in terms of your marriage and FAITH that no matter what happens with your marriage that God will guide you, and you will choose to rebuild your life to be stronger, better and most of all, HAPPIER than ever before. THAT is where the leap of faith comes in. It's so hard to understand how things could EVER be BETTER if all goes to hell in a hand-basket but you know what, they CAN be and you need to let your FAITH tell you that.
HH, I don't post this to lessen your hope. I post this to make sure that you are focused on the right thing and that thing is YOUR improvement, independent from the state of your M.
Good job, grasshopper.
The ONLY thing I take issue with is in bold above and it's the whole "meant to be" thing.
God MEANS for marriages to work out.
Most of the time though, He is invited to the wedding only.
So up climbs the divorce rate...
but He always "means" for marriages and families to last.
That being said, it's the people that screw it up.
I'll use myself as an example.
Pay attention to this, HH.
I'll try to write the short version
Individually I was lost.
My marriage left a lot to be desired.
I had an affair
Spent about 2 1/2 years walking 'round the mountain and the last nine months trying to reclaim all I threw away.
Am I now within God's will for my life?
YES.
What are the repercussions of what I did?
MY HUSBAND IS EMOTIONALLY CUT OFF FROM ME... How do I fight that?
By faith that this stand is exactly where God means for me to be. I am within His Word and within His will. I fought to get here and I fight to stay. BUT my hope is in God Who said He will "restore the years" and Who said He will "bind up the brokenhearted and "bring back that which was driven away".....My hope is not in my husband Am I standing in such a way that I EXPECT to win?
Yes What can ruin it?
My husband.
If he decides that he will live by fear that I would hurt him again, then he will never come home...if there is unforgiveness in his heart, then he will never come home. THOSE are things HE has to fight though. MY job is to pray him through. I know that because God showed me that it was my husband's prayers that brought ME out. See, I only have to look in a mirror to see evidence of just how God can change a person.
Do you say you leave it in God's hands because He is the Source of all your hope or because He is your last resort?
HH, the first thing you need to understand about standing 'by faith' is that you don't just stand there.
Faith is actually a act. It's really something you DO not something you HAVE.
Let me ask you this?
Are you wearing your wedding band?
Will you WALK by faith when everything you see says she's not coming back?
See, after 9 months of this I can say that God is going to take care of me no matter what my husband chooses. I know this because all along He has been teaching me, growing me, cultivating me. I know this because I know my stand is RIGHT, my heart is RIGHT and even when I stumble I know that it was God Who pulled me out of the pit and set my feet upon the Rock and it is He Who orders my steps now. If He did not leave me through all the crap I did, He sure won't leave me now.
Same goes for you.
