I’m getting some rest and feeling somewhat better.
I don’t know if Fille’s Model-T analogy fits right now. Frankly, I don’t think all the cranking in the world will get things going. I think it’s time to back off right now.
I’m also not so sure about Rachael’s assumption that W is depressed. Yes, I mentioned awhile back that she felt some of the symptoms returning, but she’s really pretty rational. I don’t agree with her assessment of the sit, but that doesn’t make her depressed.
It could easily be argued that I’m the one who’s depressed.
Sometimes I get pretty obsessive. This doesn’t help my case at all. I’m trying to deal with ”my” problems without dumping them on W or keeping them from her. A few weeks ago, I told her that I was trying to deal with the death of our sex life. I’d come to the conclusion that it was over. She said it wasn’t dead – only in a coma.
Well, unless she changes (it’s her libido that’s in a coma), I don’t see any hope of reviving it. It’s not even on life support.
Same thing goes for any signs of affection. It’s hard not to obsess sometimes. Her mind is made up that my needs/wants are excessive. Is her mindset because she’s depressed? Is it hormones? Is she right? None of these questions mean anything because she’s not going to “snap out of it”, and I can’t change her views.
On the bright side, I finally passed my motorcycle exam. It’s only a learner’s permit, and I won’t be able to ride without an “experienced” rider, but I’ve overcome one more hurdle. After my test, W asked me if I wanted to ride with her. We spent a couple of very pleasant hours riding through the hills.
But I still had a problem. I couldn’t ride behind her w/o having impure thoughts (sigh)
