I have a fundamental flaw in me, one I can't seem to find a way to cure, because it permeates me even more than my low self-esteem did. I can see clearly how it comes from my FOO, from the severe physical and emotional abuse I received. It is a defense mechanism of sorts, a way of temporarily satiating a hunger inside myself that can probably never be completely filled. It has to do with how I view people around me, what things go through my mind when I interact.
Ok, you brought it up on the board, gave us a little teaser, then say you can’t discuss it. What’s up? Come on out and tell us, since you want us to pull it out of you (there’s that martyr complex going again), other wise you wouldn’t have mentioned it. What exactly are you talking about? How do you know this thing is a flaw? What are you comparing it to in order to know it is a flaw?
BTW, I think GEL may be right that you should look into AD meds. That post you made to Hairdog is a whole new side of you I’ve not seen. It is a good side and one I have been hoping to come out, but it is in quite opposition to your tone earlier in the week. You went from depression to elation in the drop of a hat. Now you’re back to depression?
I know the world can turn on a dime when you make a breakthrough with your spouse so that what seemed to be the darkest, end of the world scenario suddenly becomes sunny and happy and you experience this sudden feeling of relief. But this line of thinking is bothersome.
