Quote: OK, correct me if I'm wrong. You are saying that she has never really been that passionate? You married her knowing that she was that way and now because of your sitch you are trying to change her? Do you really want to try and control her that way? Do you really think you can? Do you get my cynical point?
Yes, I do get your point. Here's the thing. I wasn't that passionate either. I never really understood that. I never understood how I was contributing, or NOT contributing to the passion in our relationship. I know that she HAS been passionate with men in the past, and men that were, well, passionate towards her I suspect. The one man in particular, the one she was engaged to until she found out he cheated multiple times on her, she said she used to instigate and be much more forward with. Who knows, maybe that's why she isn't now. It's not so much that she was hurt by him but that she equates her open sexuality, or having it come "too easy" to a man as somehow driving him to cheat. I have no clue.
So, yes, I get what you're saying but I guess I am trying to get us BOTH to a place where we BOTH say we want to go in our marriage but have never been with each other, but HAVE been with other people...W most recently with OM, sigh.
