I know my new thread is "Let it go", but I am having a very hard time trusting my H. I want reassurances, like seeing his cell phone bill which I can't get ahold of because it goes to the office. Should I ask him to see it for my peace of mind? It's just so hard to believe that he is not having any contact with her after 2 1/2 yrs. Am I just going through another phase or could my instincts be trying to tell me something? I want to ask him to see his cell bill, and I don't know why if he has nothing to hide that he would not let me see it. If he refuses then I would know. ALl this mistust is eatingme up inside. Just the things he's doing-smoking, not wearing his seatbelt-they tell me he's being reckless and maybe it has to do with guilt. I don't want to live in a sitchuation where he is lying to me still and I am just going along with it because I don't know what else to do. I just have this uneasy feeling of mistrust still and I don't know if its real-my gut is telling me something, or its just residue from him having such a long affair. I mean, do you really think he'd break it off cold turkey after that long? I am feeling really insecure about this today. Rachael M.
