ok-Your right. I need to stop asking him the same questins over and over-although its not as often as you think! We need to talk. HE never initiates anything but "safe" conversation, and that's ok. We talked alot more about his work last night than anything. He started in on that I think in order to get off the R talk which was ok. I said what I had to say-LOVINGLY and non accusitory. I thnk he understands how all this makes me feel. He can't be a doormat in this relationship-I simply stated my concerns and asked him for what I needed. Aren't we suppose to do that? He did not seem the least but upset by it. Matter of fact he was even more loving this morning (No sex though) and just a little while go told me he loved me on the phone and he really sounded genuine. I think he really wants me to believe him. He's such a dunce-it would not take much at all in the way of conversation to reassure me. I guess he thinks he is but I told him I need to know by his ACTIONS. Now, We'll see if and how anything becomes of it. If not, I will not say another thing about it, until C on the 22nd. She has to get a feel for where we are , but it is a safe envirnment,and we really get alot accomplished in there by opening up. SO, Lily tells me to go buy a thong. What do you think? DO you think it would help? I guess it couldn;t hurt. I also talked to hm about quitting work when I go back and going back to school in the spring. HE seemed ok with it. He says he wants us to be able to talk about stuff and he never talks! Unless its about work-boring!! But I listen and try to give feedback. He is a businessman and that's how he thinks (unfortunately)He compares everything to business and it drives me crazy. Again he does not know this. I am hopng for some GROWTH in the communication dept through C. So, should I initiate or leave him alone? Lily said she figured out she had to be the one to initiate. That's a 180 for us. HE ALWAYS used to be the one that could not get enough. I figure I'll let it go through the weekend and try to connect at some other level besides sex. I think that's what he's looking for. CLoseness other than sex. Well, he'll get it, and alot of it this weekend. I'll pretend the sex thing is not going to bother me,and show him I'm not preturbed about it like HE alwasy used to get. Now maybe he knows how it feels. Anyway. I'm a yr older now, so does that mean I'm wiser today? Hope so! Rachael M. BTW-I am happy things are going so well for you!
