Hey Yoyo ~ glad to see that you are over here. Things are finally starting to come good in your situation. Even Mr Yoyo seems to be coming through the fog. (about time too 0
France oooh la la ~ you know Paris is the city of love. You lucky bugger.
Cat03 & Kismet - Hiya gals..nice to have you drop in my thread... You know, with all that's happened to us, although we consciously tell ourselves to DBING, being humans, we sometimes just act crazily and go out of whack with our DBING efforts. I actually did the NO-NO on Saturday (15th). Luckily it didn't back-fire and undo all the positives. H told me that he was going to Europe...and I actually texted him on Saturday and asked where he was, and if he was in our home country. Immediately, H called me and said "Do you want me to get the waitress to speak to you in the foreign language? I swear to you... blah blah blah". I said "makes no difference, right. She could be with you over there blah blah blah"...there was to-and-fro convo, and at one time, H did say "please don't make me beg over the phone...".. and he said "you are not sure with coming over? I promise you that things will be okay. I've not said promise before, but I am promising you. ok?"
Anyway, after I've calmed down, I texted him "Okay. I will be calm and happy". And he texted back "Ok Good. Then I feel better. She is on her way to the US...you can check with your contacts.I'll show you my passport to show you i'm no where near US...in fact half the world away. So calm down ok?? All will be ok."
So, I guessed I am lucky this time. When I told my mom, she actually told me off. She said that I shouldn't even ask...I've accepted him back..I cannot show my distrust every time he goes away for business as it would ruin things. My girlfriend actually said the same thing...
Nothing much happening.. H is still in Europe. He has been calling me daily, and texting me multiple times daily.
I did go backwards abit last night.. when I texted him worrying about our finances. To and fro of texts and thought that I have upset him..but he was still cool, which was good. Last text that I got from him yesterday was "Lots of pretty girls over here.... talk to you tomorrow. Nite nite and I luv you".. The pretty girls bit is quite normal. Pre-A, he would tell me about pretty girls that he has seen at work or have flirted with blah blah blah. Only he has never ever mentioned ow's existence.. The I luv you bit was kinda nice..
Today..received multiple texts from H.. First one was to "hope that I felt better today".. Other texts today: - Let's go to London in either Oct or Xmas, when do you prefer? Just u and me, tempted? - Was thinking we fly thurs night and return sunday. Weekend getaway and shopping. Get u some tods and gucci. Don't worry about money ok. Whe I say we are ok... I really meant it. - Or maybe New York. Let's talk this weend end. Luv you.
So I got Luv Yous on two consecutive days.. Baby steps..baby steps..
Hey Cat03 - Yup... it's nice with the ILYs but they are mainly on texts and not face-to-face verbal stuff. But better not complain...at least I get written ones better than none!
Journalling.... Nothing much happened. I went to Country X last Friday and returned on Sunday. H did ask me to stay a couple days more but it was kinda difficult to change my flight. Nothing major happened while I was in Country X. We shopped, we cooked and we had fun together... No arguments, which is good...
S8 will be turning 9 soon, and we are gonna have a party this saturday. H said that he will try to come back as he will be busy up till Friday night..and not too sure if he can get a flight back. Nope, am not fretting nor bothered by it.
H is also gonna be flying to Country Y this Monday night...and will be there from then till at least Thursday. He has asked me to join him there.. Country Y is a bus ride or car ride away.. (about 4 hours??) I will no longer be working then and I said OK. H then emailed me and asked me to bring his mom and the boys over if possible....
Oh yeah.. while we were having coffee at an upmarket place last weekend, H mentioned ow's name again.. it's like she is a "normal" friend.. I didn't make it a big deal and continued with stuffing my face with my chocolate raspberry cake. I wonder what he was thinking????
Hello Cat03.... Yeap. I'm sure he doesn't use his brain that much, since it's already sort of mushed up from the alien experiments and all.
Nothing much happening since my last post. Have been really busy at work, sorting out documents so that work can be handed over to my coworkers... Monday, 31st July will be my last day at work!!! Oh..and I got myself a new laptop...since i would have to give my current one back to my company... not to mention my company car on Monday too... plus I would no longer be a salaried worker. BUT guessed I would have to look at the positive..that I would be embarking on a new M with H... that it will be a new beginning and that we will have a better M.
H has been communicating rather frequently, both via texts and phone calls. My last visit to Country X, found a house that I really liked and we gave the agent an offer. But we could not agree on the owner's terms. So, I guessed we are not getting that house... H said that he would be visiting his bosses house tomorrow, and most likely we gonna "inherit" his house as he is vacating next week. I guessed.. a house that is good enough for H's boss, should be good enough for us. We'll see how things goes. The pro is also that we would be able to move into this house ~ mid-August vs. if we would have taken the house from the agent, we would only be able to move in end-September... So the "bosses house" would be good so that school bus' schedule can be set at the beginning of the school year and need not be changed...
Having a party for older S tomorrow. He will be turning 9 next week! My little baby is turning 9! How time flies... H can't make it back for S9's birthday party. He said he had to finalize some contracts on Monday and would have to work over the weekend. Oh well... S9 spoke to him yesterday and he was like "Awww dad. I want you to come back for my birthday. I BEG you..." Well, am sure H felt mightily guilty. And today, my MIL came over for dinner and she told me that S6 asked her "Are you coming to your grandson's birthday party tomorrow?" and MIL said "Of course" and S6 said "Well, YOUR SON is not coming back". MIL thought that was rather amusing. I related the incident to H this evening, and he found it rather funny too.
Well, at first, was supposed to meet H in Country Y on Tuesday, but because of the contract thingy next week. He has been told not to travel next week. So, rendevous in Country Y is out. H did ask me to come over on Tuesday and perhaps fly back on Friday. Checked the flights today, and it is kinda pricey... H also said that he would come home next week... So, most likely I will not go visit him in Country X next week... Current Plan is to perhaps fly to Country X with H the following Sunday, i.e. 6th August and sort out boys' school over in Country X etc etc. Come back home. Sort out the movers etc. And lug the boys over to Country X ~ 22 Aug for start of school on the 28 Aug. BUT plans always change!!!! Not gonna bother so much.
One thing that is constantly at the back of my head is that ow's stuff are still sitting in the store in the current house in Country X. I really don't want her stuff to follow us when we move into the new house, i.e "bosses' house". You think I should ask H what he intends to do with her stuff?????
And another thing that is also bugging me is that H renewed his ID card (something like social security card) in January of year... and he put in ow's address on the card. It's such a bad bad reminder of the A ..that H wanted to leave the family, and be with ow!!! He had her address!!!!! What should I do? Should I casually ask H about it now? Or should I wait till I have moved to Country X, settle in and when I "sort of" happen to see the ID, then only ask H about what he intends to do with that ?? Or WHAT??
Hi YoYo...It's been a long time since I checked your thread, and I am so happy that things have taken this turn for you! I think you are doing great, and the feelings you have are completely normal. I also think your Mom has some great advice, and it will take time, but you have decided to forgive - now you have to work on carrying through with that. Don't give up because it doesn't happen all at once - it's going along, and that's good. Men don't see things the same way we do, and you need to create some new happy times with him now to carry you through this together. I see many, many positives that maybe it's harder for you to focus on because you are right in the middle of it, and because you've had such a hard time for so long.
I wouldn't question what he will do with OW stuff. Let him handle it. If it does end up in your house, quietly get rid of it - end of story.
bonfire..j/k are you sure stuff still there? I agree w/the above, if your H for some strange reason hauls that stuff w/you I'd either dispose of it quietly or ask him w/a blank face if he wants to ship that out.
I also had a thing that bothered me dealign with addresses, my H hasnt; yet change his address. When I confronted him at C he just said he had not thougth about it and that he got his mail anyways (I mentioned how that issue made think he was hiding something.)
Maybe there is a reason he did that, or, he just didnt' think about it. After a while I'd calmy and off handedly bring it up.
Be not afraid...I will repay you for the years the locusts have eaten Joel2
30something 2kids survivor of S, MLC, A, D I have peace in my heart, at last.
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together... No arguments, which is good... 
plus I would no longer be a salaried worker. 