Thanks Joe. I have a friend who is a former addict and he has taught me how to focus on surviving the next 5 minutes. That is really important right now. I just had to drive by her store to get to a client and I didn't even look in the store as I drove by. It is going to take everything I have to focus on just me. The hurt is so great and I am almost desperate to make it go away. That is why I made such bad decisions lately. You are right about becoming who I used to be. I was happy, funny, and enjoyed myself. I have let my R take that away from me.
She has to make the decision and I felt like her past bad decisions make me believe that she will screw up this very important one. That is where I now believe I am wrong. Down deep she wants this to work or she wouldn't have handled it the way she has.
